Overcoming Negative Self-Talk

 

by Cassandra England, Counselor at ASPIRE

What is negative self-talk? Negative self-talk is speaking harshly toward yourself. Four common types of negative self-talk include:

  1. Filtering
    Negative aspects of a situation are magnified, and the positive ones are filtered out.
  2. Personalizing
    Automatically blaming yourself when something bad happens.
  3. Catastrophizing
    Automatically anticipating the worst outcome.
  4. Polarizing
    Things are only seen as good or bad, with no middle ground. The feeling of either being perfect or a total failure.

The good news is, in the same way we’ve made a habit of degrading ourselves, we can also learn to be kind to ourselves. Speaking to ourselves with kindness is incredibly beneficial for our mental health. Below are some ways to shift from negative to positive self-talk:

  1. Create awareness. Recognizing negative self-talk is the first step to change.
  2. Reframe negative thoughts. Take the sting out of negative labels by changing them to positive or neutral words or expressions. For example, use “growth” instead of “failure;” or “I’m having a hard time” instead of “I suck.”
  3. Write your experiences in a journal. Channel your thoughts onto paper—a safe and judgment-free space. Read through your journal occasionally to help identify negative thought patterns on a daily, weekly, and monthly basis.
  4. Practice positive affirmations. Remind yourself of your strengths and talents by simply saying them to yourself out loud or writing them down. A positive affirmation can be something like “I am kind, caring, and a comfort to others.”
  5. Be mindful of your environment. We can be a product of our environment, including influences from the media, our relationships, and physical surroundings. Is there a place or person you feel more comfortable with? More guarded around? Try to recognize your experience when you enter different environments.
  6. Celebrate your wins. Don’t discount your talents and accomplishments. When you know you’ve done something awesome, write it down. It can be beneficial to reflect on later.

Resources

  • Within the eM Life app, filter by the “Compassion & Kindness” category for some excellent meditations about being kind and loving to yourself and others.
  • As part of the SMSC’s Fitbit program, you have free access to Fitbit Premium. In Fitbit Premium’s Meditation list, check out the sessions in the “Boost Body Positivity” section!
  • The Wondr Health program (offered through PreventionFirst!) incorporates lessons on how to be in a good headspace while working on improving your health. If you’ve gotten down on yourself while trying to lose weight, this program is for you!
  • At ASPIRE, you will find personalized help for improving your thought patterns. Call 952.403.5241 to schedule an appointment with one of the clinic’s on-site counselors.

Community Member Resources

  • Visit the SMSC Specialty Clinic for personalized help on improving your thought patterns. Call 952.496.6164 to schedule an appointment with a counselor.

Sources

Mayo Clinic. (2019). Mayo Mindfulness: Overcoming Negative Self-Talk.
National Alliance on Mental Illness Chicago. (N.D.). #SelfCareFriday: On Positive Self Talk.